Blog Post
Who has to change for you to be happy?
Lynette Beer • Apr 03, 2017
South Africa is one of the most beautiful countries in the world. A country rich in its diversity of cultures, languages, history and a wide variety of landscapes from the bushveld to the seaside with everything in between.
Sometimes it seems that South Africans have just one thing in common. A very rare national past time, and no it’s not to braai, it’s to complain! Complaining about sports, politics, the petrol price and worst of all, complaining about ourselves.
Have you listen to yourself lately? “I am fat.” “I hate my job”. “My marriage is a mess.” “My children don’t listen.” “I am a bad mother.” “I am too busy...” It gets even worse when we are actually talking to ourselves (and yes, people do talk to themselves, all the time!) You are struggling with something and out come the words: “You idiot. Why can’t you get this right? You are useless.”
You wouldn’t say that to anyone you know now would you? Why do you say it to yourself then? The one person you are supposed to know the best. The one person you are supposed to trust, to rely on and to love with all your heart, body and soul is you.
Oh I can hear you now... “What? Are you crazy? That’s so selfish. Nobody is supposed to think that much of oneself. The Bible warns us against being too self-absorbed. We are supposed to be unselfish and to love God and our neighbours.”
Yes indeed, you are quite right. You have just forgotten the rest of the verse that says “as you love yourself.”
For you to live a successful and fulfilled life, you have to start to love and appreciate yourself. Because you are unique. You are special. God created you with so much love in His heart and with a specific plan in mind.
And here you are... downgrading yourself. Why? Because you are not like your sister / mother / dad / boss / brother / nephew / Madiba or the late Princess Diana? Good for you. You are not supposed to be like any of them! You are uniquely you. An individual, albeit an imperfect one. All human beings are imperfect. All of us have our faults, strong points, weak points, talents and gifts. Nobody has a perfect life, because you know, life is not perfect. Life is not fair. But and this is a but worthy of capital letters, BUT it’s up to you what you do with your life! It’s your choice every day.
Remember these crucial keywords in your journey to love and accept yourself -gratitude and positive thinking. Stop dwelling on all the negative things in your life and start being grateful for what you have. Write them down, you will be amazed how long that list is. And start to consciously think positively about yourself. Your brain is probably programmed over many years to think negatively and it’s oh so easy to join the circle of complainers. You can reprogram yourself through prayer and constantly concentrating to speak and think positively. Thus to answer the question... who needs to change for you to be happy? Only the one looking back at you in the mirror, the rest will follow suit.
Sometimes it seems that South Africans have just one thing in common. A very rare national past time, and no it’s not to braai, it’s to complain! Complaining about sports, politics, the petrol price and worst of all, complaining about ourselves.
Have you listen to yourself lately? “I am fat.” “I hate my job”. “My marriage is a mess.” “My children don’t listen.” “I am a bad mother.” “I am too busy...” It gets even worse when we are actually talking to ourselves (and yes, people do talk to themselves, all the time!) You are struggling with something and out come the words: “You idiot. Why can’t you get this right? You are useless.”
You wouldn’t say that to anyone you know now would you? Why do you say it to yourself then? The one person you are supposed to know the best. The one person you are supposed to trust, to rely on and to love with all your heart, body and soul is you.
Oh I can hear you now... “What? Are you crazy? That’s so selfish. Nobody is supposed to think that much of oneself. The Bible warns us against being too self-absorbed. We are supposed to be unselfish and to love God and our neighbours.”
Yes indeed, you are quite right. You have just forgotten the rest of the verse that says “as you love yourself.”
For you to live a successful and fulfilled life, you have to start to love and appreciate yourself. Because you are unique. You are special. God created you with so much love in His heart and with a specific plan in mind.
And here you are... downgrading yourself. Why? Because you are not like your sister / mother / dad / boss / brother / nephew / Madiba or the late Princess Diana? Good for you. You are not supposed to be like any of them! You are uniquely you. An individual, albeit an imperfect one. All human beings are imperfect. All of us have our faults, strong points, weak points, talents and gifts. Nobody has a perfect life, because you know, life is not perfect. Life is not fair. But and this is a but worthy of capital letters, BUT it’s up to you what you do with your life! It’s your choice every day.
Remember these crucial keywords in your journey to love and accept yourself -gratitude and positive thinking. Stop dwelling on all the negative things in your life and start being grateful for what you have. Write them down, you will be amazed how long that list is. And start to consciously think positively about yourself. Your brain is probably programmed over many years to think negatively and it’s oh so easy to join the circle of complainers. You can reprogram yourself through prayer and constantly concentrating to speak and think positively. Thus to answer the question... who needs to change for you to be happy? Only the one looking back at you in the mirror, the rest will follow suit.
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