The one question most people struggle with sooner or later, and some even constantly, is what is my purpose in life? What is my destiny?
If you have ever attended one of my workshops, or read any of my books you would know that I am a firm believer that everyone is born with a purpose, destined for a life of success.
As stated in the introduction of my book: If you want to you can: “We are all born for greatness and success. We are born to be creators, explorers, leaders, thinkers, and to touch the lives of others. We are born to be somebody, to leave our mark and to change the world. We were born to exceed the limits placed on us by others and to live a life of success and to have a spirit of excellence. We were born to be extraordinary and to live beyond our circumstances, rather than be defined by them.”
What does a life of success actually mean?
If we read the quotation we immediately see the names and faces of famous people flashing through our minds. You know, the Hollywood stars, the famous music bands, the well-known business people who are continuously on the front pages of magazines, drive around in flashy sports cars and live in mansions. But, do they really live a life of success?
Some of them do, of course, but there are so many of them ending up in rehab centres or getting divorced time and time again. It’s also tragic that so many of the rich and famous commits suicide. Clearly, success cannot be defined by how much possessions you have or how famous you are.
To live a life of success, you have to know who you are. You cannot define your identity in your flashy car, big house, career, your wife, your husband or your children. Possessions and other people cannot make you happy. You should know who you are in yourself and be happy with yourself. Others cannot and should not take the responsibility for who you are or to make your happy.
If you know who you are, thus your temperament with all it’s strong- and weak points, your values, your habits, your likes and dislikes, then you are one step closer in defining your purpose in life.
It starts with a dream
What was that one thing you constantly said or did when you were a child? We are all born with a specific dream in our hearts, that’s our purpose, but somewhere along the line these dreams get squashed and we forget. That’s when the big question starts bugging us, what am I suppose to do with my life?
Try to remember what it was you really liked to do when you were a child. Ask your parents or siblings if you can’t remember. Maybe you loved to build things, or was forever “baking” pretend pies and cakes for your family using all kinds of weird ingredients. Maybe circumstances and people forced you away from your love of baking and now you are an unhappy accountant instead of the chef you secretly wanted to be.
You know, it’s never too late to do something about those dreams you are harbouring in your heart. Nothing prevents you from becoming a part time chef, writer or even a builder. If you want to you can.
What if my dream feels insignificant?
Motivational speakers, internet articles and magazines nowadays tell you to “dream big” and “the sky is the limit.” We tend to think that this means all of us should become famous or start our own highly profit-making businesses or at least travel the globe. In essence, we think we all have to have these huge dreams that will change the world. Put us on the map so to speak.
In the meantime, you want to know what your purpose in life is, but if you think about it really hard and are honest with yourself, what you really want is to spend quality time with your children. Is there something wrong with you? Why don’t you have all these big dreams that the experts are talking about?
Rest assured, there is nothing wrong with you or your dreams. If we look at the quotation from If you want to you can again: “We are born to be creators, explorers, leaders, thinkers, and to touch the lives of others. ” Not all of us are supposed to be the CEOs of large companies, live life in the fast lane and become famous, but we are all called to touch the lives of others. To leave our mark on the world. Be that to be the best parent you can be to your children you can be, or to be the one all your friends turn to for advice or to be the best in your work whatever that might be.
It’s your life, your dreams. Don’t be afraid to do the things you feel in your heart you are destined to be. All dreams are significant. Every person can make a difference. Every person has an impact on those around them. It’s up to you if your impact on people is negative or positive.
Make peace with who you are
You have to like, no you have to love, accept and respect, yourself first before you can live your dreams and make an impact on others. I know of a woman who for many years couldn’t look at herself in the mirror. She didn’t even have a mirror in her house! Nowadays, she shares her story with many people. She is proud of who she is and her achievements. Ten years ago she was unhealthy, overweight and hadn’t had one good word for or about herself. Then she decided to follow her dream. She wanted to compete in cycle races. When she bought her first bicycle, her family shook their heads at her. In her first race, the officials stopped her halfway, because they thought she would never be able to finish the race. She persisted. She kept on practising. Today, she has successfully completed some of South Africa’s toughest races, including the Cape Town Cycle Race and the 94.7 Cycle race. She conquered her own doubts and fears and ignored those who said she couldn’t do it.
Whatever your circumstances are, whatever your dreams are, go for it. Don’t give up! Listen to your own heart. Follow your own dreams, be they big or small, and never try to copy someone else’s life.
